Loving people doesn’t happen just because you’re present…loving people happens when your heart is open and your attention shows up. Sometimes it’s hard for me to admit I’ve begged God to increase my nets, asked Him to multiply, expand diversity, and then when things get messy it feels like even a few goldfish take up too much space in my life.

What’s easier for you?

To open up your home? Or to open up your life? And what does Jesus honor most?

“…and a woman welcomed Jesus into her house.” Luke 10:38

Throughout Jesus’ walk on earth, He went to people’s homes…Peter’s, Matthew’s, Simon the Pharisee, Zacchaeus, Mary and Martha…to name a handful. As Jesus entered people’s homes, they opened up their lives. Opening your home, practicing hospitality, and opening up your life to others is important to Jesus. Hospitality, no matter where you are, is the sacrifice of opening your life…listening and creating space in the presence of being…to the people Jesus puts in your path.

Look at Martha in Luke 10:38-41. For Martha, hospitality was about making things just right, good and comfortable…or maybe she was making herself comfortable in looking right, good and perfect? Martha opened her home to Jesus, but not her attention. Her sister Mary showed true hospitality– she chose to be present.

Who are you letting in to your home and your life? To build a life that cultivates friendship, it’s important to open the doors to your home and your attention to hospitality, and hospitality isn’t just opening up your home…it’s expecting others, like Jesus did, to open up their homes to you too. In that, we open up our lives to each other in mutual reciprocity and friendship.

I shifted my car into park, looking for the apartment number. My chest pounded a little harder, faster than usual as I looked past the ones identified as pimps. I was outside of my sadly privileged comfort zone. “Don’t you pay no attention, Miss Kathy, you walk right past them. My door is right after them people standing there,” her text encouraged when she sent me her address. It was the first time I visited my friend in her home. Signs on the door warned go away. I knocked. I was ushered in to the living room through one of the most loving hugs and biggest grins I had ever received. That was the first day I really got to know my friend, as she trusted me in her space. 

Living relationally has nothing to do with where you live, but has everything with how you love.

Practice hospitality.
Be present.
Share your story.
Be vulnerable to your messes and imperfection.

Practice reciprocity, make it mutual. Open your home. Open your life.